'Sometimes It's Not Stealing,' Welch's Storybook Says

When is stealing just peachy keen OK? When parents nick their kids’ Welch’s Fruit Snacks, of course.

A satirical storybook from the brand and GUT Miami says so, and Kristin Chenoweth narrates the tale below:

“You might have heard your parents say,
Stealing things is NOT OK.
It’s not OK to steal a car,
Or candy bars,
Or your friend’s guitar.”

Alas, such sub-Seussian virtue soon fades:

“But in one case, it’s not a crime.
Stealing Welch’s Fruit Snacks isn’t bad,
When the Fruit Snacks thief is mom or dad.”

Well, they bought the stuff. It’s their house. They get dibs, dammit!

“As summer ends and school begins again, parents will have more chances to snatch some of their kids Welch’s Fruit Snacks. But thanks to this storybook, taking some from your kids has never felt so guilt-free,” says GUT creative director Danny Alvarez. “We wanted to make it easier for everyone to enjoy Welch’s Fruit Snacks, and it just makes sense to do it in a format that everyone is familiar with—storybooks.”

Such formats are in vogue. They range from Huggies’ super-silly baby’s-butt book to Change the Ref’s harrowing meditation on gun control.